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Home Forums Peer Review Requests Reply to this thread to ask for a peer review of your ‘learner’s manifesto’

  • Reply to this thread to ask for a peer review of your ‘learner’s manifesto’

    Posted by Abdullah Williams on September 8, 2020 at 5:47 pm

    Reply to this thread to ask for a peer review of your ‘expert learner’s manifesto’.

    Make sure you ask politely and provide a link to your blog post.

    Deleted User replied 9 months, 3 weeks ago 10 Members · 17 Replies
  • 17 Replies
  • Deleted User

    Deleted User
    December 9, 2020 at 7:20 pm
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    Hello my name is Dahir, i am in yr 10 and i am here to politely ask for reviews towards my manifesto. Thank you.

    https://www.sophicly.com/dahir-jama-yr10-manifesto-for-expert-learning/?action=bp_sap_mark_read&_wpnonce=592d8f2800#comments

    • Mohamed Daahir

      Member
      January 23, 2021 at 3:25 pm
      6680 XP
      46 Perfect Scores
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      Expert Learners: Expert Learner

      My review:
      Criteria 1:
      Fair
      You only talked about some points from the 6 principles.
      Criteria 2:
      Excellent
      You finished the manifesto and talked about expert learning.
      Criteria 3:
      Good
      You talked about some points from the 6 principles learnt but you missed a few.
      Criteria 4:
      Excellent
      You used punctuation in the correct spaces. You also organised the manifesto well and used correct spelling
      Criteria 5:
      Excellent
      You mentioned that expert learning can be used for anything you are learning.

      Overall, your manifesto was very good, you explained all your points and used a few literary devices.

  • Mohamed Daahir

    Member
    December 26, 2020 at 2:44 pm
    6680 XP
    46 Perfect Scores
    110 Logins
    Expert Learners: Expert Learner
    • sumaya

      Member
      January 30, 2021 at 3:05 pm
      3541 XP
      19 Perfect Scores
      101 Logins
      Expert Learners: Expert Learner

      My Review:

      Criteria 1:

      Excellent – You talked about the six principles in your points

      Criteria 2:

      Good – To be honest you could have wrote a bit more

      Criteria 3;

      Good – You talked about all six principles

      Criteria 4:

      Excellent – Your punctuation is really good

      Criteria 5:

      Good – You could have explained things a bit more

      Overall evaluation/feedback;

      Your manifesto was very good and you made your 10 proclamations very clear and easy to understand however you could have explained much more

      • Abdullah Williams

        Administrator
        January 30, 2021 at 3:12 pm
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        Well done, Sumaya!

      • Deleted User

        Deleted User
        February 17, 2021 at 6:32 pm
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        My review

        Criteria 1

        Good: there was 4 good learning principles

        Criteria 2

        Good: Project is complete but successfully addresses 1 of the following: shows a depth of understanding of topics

        Criteria 3

        Excellent: proclamations are clear and accurate (good research)

        Criteria 4

        Fair: its organized in an irregular stanza especially the first couple paragraphs but the grammar and spelling was good.

        Criteria 5

        excellent: i can see a lot of potential in this manifesto as it includes key facts about the lessons you have learnt.

        In conclusion, i think the manifesto was good.

    • Oliver Dul

      Member
      July 22, 2021 at 7:09 pm
      4795 XP
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      Expert Learners: Expert Learner

      My Review:

      Criteria 1:

      Excellent – You have talked about all the six principles and it is clearly understandable.

      Criteria 2:

      Excellent- You have shown a depth of understanding of topics related to learning and used the format effectively.

      Criteria 3:

      Good- Proclamations link accurately but number 9 was not clear which learning framework it links to and you appear to have made 3 proclamations (7, 8, 9) based on one principle (Universal Design for Learning)

      Criteria 4:

      Excellent- Your manifesto is well organised and produced, easily understandable and follows the rules of spelling and grammar

      Criteria 5:

      Good: Your manifesto was clear but you could have explained how to implement the proclamations into real life.

      Overall feedback:

      I think you have communicated clearly and used your imagination to make quite effective techniques. However, you could have used a more ambitious tone to enhance the purpose of your writing; in this case your tone is a little too neutral. Overall, though, your vocabulary, spelling, punctuation, grammar and clarity are effective.

  • sumaya

    Member
    March 13, 2021 at 2:40 pm
    3541 XP
    19 Perfect Scores
    101 Logins
    Expert Learners: Expert Learner
  • Oliver Dul

    Member
    July 8, 2021 at 5:28 pm
    4795 XP
    4 Perfect Scores
    94 Logins
    Expert Learners: Expert Learner
    • Mohamed Ahmed

      Member
      August 8, 2021 at 5:17 pm
      1824 XP
      4 Perfect Scores
      64 Logins
      Expert Learners: Expert Learner

      My review

      Criteria 1:

      Excellent – You have talked about the 6 points correctly and it’s very understandable.

      Criteria 2:

      Excellent – You have written about the topics well and made effective use of the format.

      Criteria 3:

      Excellent – All your proclamations link clearly and accurately to all the principles learnt during the lessons.

      Criteria 4:

      Excellent – You have made the manifesto very well-organized, well-written and very easy to understand and follows the rules of spelling, punctuation and grammar.

      Criteria 5:

      Good – The project could serve your intended use without much modification needed.

      Overall

      The score I would give this work is 14 out of 15 because the work is greatly laid out, very understandable, very accurate and uses all the 6 points available. Also I didn’t give the last mark because I think you could have scored more if you made the reader think with more questions.

  • Mohamed Ahmed

    Member
    July 25, 2021 at 6:25 pm
    1824 XP
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    Expert Learners: Expert Learner

    Hello my name is Mohamed and I would like to request for my manifesto to be reviewed. https://www.sophicly.com/how-to-be-an-expert-learner-by-mohamed-ahmed-yr-8/

    How to Be an Expert Learner by Mohamed Ahmed: YR 8 

    • Deleted User

      Deleted User
      December 19, 2021 at 11:42 am
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      Criteria 1: All 6 learning principles were addressed substantially in the project. That is, the target audience of the project is left with a good understanding of the key points of each learning principle.

      Criteria 2: Project is complete and successfully addresses both of the following: Shows a depth of understanding of topics related to learning and makes effective use of the format.

      Criteria 3: Proclamations link mostly clearly to the principles learnt during the lessons.

      Criteria 4: The project is well-organized, well-written and produced, easy to understand, and follows the relevant rules of spelling and grammar.

      Criteria 5: Project clearly can be used beyond the scope of this course. Author’s intended use for the project seems able to be accomplished.

      Overall, I really liked the manifesto, very easy to understand, accurate, and it’s formatted really well. I would give it a 14/15 . The only thing I would change is from the beginning when you said, “Do you want to become a master”; I would change the word ‘master’ to ‘an expert learner’.👍

  • Deleted User

    Deleted User
    November 14, 2021 at 11:49 am
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    Hello my name is Ibrahim. Can someone please go over my work and go over it.

    https://www.sophicly.com/the-path-to-become-an-expert-learner/

    • Deleted User

      Deleted User
      November 21, 2021 at 11:16 am
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      Criteria 1: Excellent- You have talked about all six principles and explained them in further detail.

      Criteria 2: Excellent – You used lots of keywords in your writing such as fixed mindset and growth mindset.

      Criteria 3: Fair- Format could be better; for example, some of your spaces were either too big or missing.

      Criteria 4: Excellent- The project is well-organized, well-written and produced, easy to understand, and follows the relevant rules of spelling
      and grammar.

      Criteria 5: Excellent- Project clearly can be used beyond the scope of this course. Author’s intended use for the project seems able to be accomplished.

      Your writing was very good but there were many flaws such as your formatting and I felt like you asked a few too many rhetorical questions. If you fix those, your writing will be flawless. 13/15 👍

  • Deleted User

    Deleted User
    November 14, 2021 at 11:52 am
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    Hello, my name Abdurahman and I ask kindly of you to review my work thanks.

    https://www.sophicly.com/journey-of-becoming-an-expert-learner-year-9-abdurahman/

    • Deleted User

      Deleted User
      November 21, 2021 at 10:56 am
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      Criteria1:
      Excellent, you have used all the 6 learning principles.

      Criteria2:
      Excellent, you have showed a depth of understanding of topics relating to learning

      Criteria3:
      Excellent, proclamations link clearly and accurately to the principles learnt during the lessons.

      Criteria4:
      Excellent, the project is well organised ,well written and produced, easy to understand, and follows the relevant rules of spelling and grammar.

      Criteria5:
      Good: project clearly can be used beyond the scope of this course. Author’s intended use for the project seems able to be accomplished. Sometimes you did not need to make a new paragraph because you are talking about the same thing.-

      Your blog was good but you could fix some stuff; for example, sometimes you did not need to make a new paragraph because you were talking about the same thing. Other than that your work is flawless.

  • Deleted User

    Deleted User
    December 19, 2021 at 11:08 am
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    Hello, my name is Harun, and I would like someone to review my manifesto.https://www.sophicly.com/how-to-become-an-expert-learner-harun-year-8/